Saturday, May 11, 2013

Mom or father?

 Let us repeat the last line of John Paul II quote from the Message to women:

By the same token society needs to call husbands and fathers to their family responsibilities, and ought to strive for a situation in which they will not be forced by economic circumstances to move away from the home in search of work. (Paragraph 3)


So, here John Paul II is telling society and us that we need to do what we can in our positions to call fathers to their family duties.  American men are down too.  Did you notice? I may be wrong, but I have seen the increase of the feminist movement as a pounding down of the father and men in general. As we become more aware of our true feminine dignity, we should too become aware of the masculine dignity and respond to the man with our new found understanding with humility and charity.

I see two actions we have to take.

It is important that we do not try to do the father's job and we gain control of our tongues.

Too many times women, with their great stamina, determination and willingness to serve, take too much control. And let's face it ladies, the way men see it, if a women is willing to do it, they will let us. But this is dangerous. Why? Because once a woman begins to do "his work" he ceases to do it.  So, we need to use our ingenious sense and leave undone those things that are needed to be done by him. (I do not mean leading the children in prayer though. Dad's should lead family prayer, but this is not something possible to wait around for, but tack is needed to not exclude and encourage them...)

back to the topic....We must especially let him know we like his work and appreciate the time he puts into it. In addition, men have this tack...as some recently joked with me about...to turn off the ears after a woman has ranted and complained after a few seconds. Now, I am not saying this is good or do I think it is respectful. But it may be part of a consequence of how some of us have behaved.  We need to ask ourselves if we complain and boss men around? Do we tell them they cannot do anything right? Do we take a "mightier than you" approach and lecture them? They are not our children, we need to remember that and respect them as partners in mission and as dignified equals.

Has anyone tried or see what happens when you let him know you need his help? Or what happens if we are considerate and raise issues at a time when they are not still overwhelmed with the days job? Or what about a big sincere thank you, which food for them seems to speak well! Ha! Joking aside, we need to ask ourselves if we are truly respectful and treat him as we wish to be treated?

Our husbands and men in our lives, including sons, do not need us complaining all the time. That does not imply we do not share our views, it implies we do it wisely, humbly, and to remember charity above all else.

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